Brown Sugar

Palm trees swayed in the delicious Caribbean breeze — casting shadows that danced in hypnotic patterns over the patio and manicured grounds beyond. The warm midday air was intoxicating, rich and floral with the scent of freshly cut grass and subtle notes of brine around the edges. Vibrant turquoise sky peeked through the deep green blades of the canopy above.

I pulled my attention back to the task at hand. The brown paper package and its contents beckoned me to indulge. A familiar voice behind me made me flinch.

“That stuff is going to kill you," she said.

"I didn't know you were here," I said turning to see her.

April stared at me in silence awaiting acknowledgment of her prior statement. The weight of her gaze was more than I could take. “Not this again. It's no big deal. Can't you just relax?"

“Are you serious?" Her tone sharp and critical. "No I will not relax. If that trash doesn't kill you, they will. Sooner or later, they’re going to catch on. Then what? I'll tell you what. Then I'm a single mom."

“Relax, baby. I was in and out. Nobody saw me."

"Don't 'baby' me. Why are you being such a fool?"

“Aw, come on. Don't be like that." I said. "It wasn't long ago we did this together. Have you forgotten?"

“I remember,” she replied. “I also remember our children and this new life we came here to build. Do you remember that?"

"But—"

“Don't push me. I said I don’t want any. I don't like how it makes me feel.”

"Since when?"

"Since drop it," April replied irritably. "Hold on. Are you high right now?"

"No," I shot back reflexively. I heard myself say the word before I'd fully processed the question or could consider my options. Everything moved so fast. My senses screamed and my heart felt like it would explode in my chest. My head was light. Standing perfectly still, I could feel the movement of the world. I was in constant motion. My vision rotated and reset when I closed my eyes — my perspective snapping back to its starting position with every blink. I was high. Very high. But I couldn't tell her that.

"I can't believe you would lie to me. You —" April stopped mid-sentence. I saw panic flash in her eye and her feathers puff out in distress moments before she launched skyward in a flitting blur.

I flew into the air as something crashed down around me with incredible force. My escape was blocked by something like a thick spider's web, white strands woven tightly in a seemingly impenetrable shroud. I thrashed against it until my wings burned. I'd seen humans use this sort of thing before with fish. It was no web. It was made for trapping.

The webbing was attached to a long straight stick held by a human. I had never been so close to one before. It was gigantic. The creature loomed over me, staring at me with its horrifying eyes — each a small brown island in a sea of white, and the pair anchored together on an expanse of naked skin the color of wet sand. A tuft of stringy brown feathers covered the top of its head.

A series of deep guttural noises came from the dark pit where its beak should be. Even obscured by the webbing, its grotesque beak-hole was unbearable. Everything that I'd eaten that day came up and out involuntarily.

Standing in my shame, slicked seeds coated in the sweet crystals, I thought of April. I thought of our chicks. How could I be so selfish? My appetite for that delectable poison had brought me here — just as she predicted. A wave of guilt crashed over me as the creature reached for me with its fleshy talons.

"I'm so sorry, April," I said as the world closed in around me.

This story is also available on Medium (if you're into that sort of thing).